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In this case, their conversations had lasted more than a week with a lot of quality exchanges.He had been consistent, proving he was trustworthy and willing, so he wasn’t jumping the gun in asking for her number at all.
Have the one-or two-liners turned into novellas you read and reread again and again? If you’ve exchanged multiple messages or emails with a new interest online and he hasn’t asked you out yet, throw him a “softball.” A softball is your letting him know, indirectly, that if he asks you out he can be assured of a yes. For a man, it’s a casual, no pressure, budget-friendly, really nice way to find out if someone is a match for you. It makes it more real for them and also feels more personal!
Similarly, if she’s willing to move around with you – to another section of the book store, back to the bar to grab a drink, to a quieter section of the party where you can talk – it’s a strong indicator that not only is she interested, but that she trusts you…
and therefor she’s more likely to pick up when you call after getting her number.
If a woman does this to you, it is your perfect opportunity to assert yourself as a nice guy but not a pushover (the dream combo).
I coached him through his next move — to tell her he respected her wanting to feel safe and he understands there are a lot of creeps out there, but to be clear, he was online dating to meet people. So often guys just acquiesce and keep emailing, meanwhile things pitter out or they never know when is appropriate to ask for the number again. “I appreciate that you are bold enough to state what you want without being pushy. Remember guys, women respond to how you make them feel.
That way he knows he doesn’t have to stay on the phone forever (ahhh…sweet relief! Even if it gets awkward, allow him to take the lead and invite you on a date! If geographically undesirable, make a real plan to meet up.
There’s a chance you’re going to meet someone who’s compatible with you who lives in a different zip code.
Getting him to move a digital relationship offline is an important step in your quest to find love, so follow the steps above and you should be on your way.
When online dating, there is a balancing act that goes into moving from the email exchanges to a number exchange.
If so, you’re likely headed deep into the throes of a pseudo-relationship unless you move quickly! For example, tell him you love to explore new cafes or coffee houses. Hopefully he suggests something similar without the prompt; but if he seems interested yet doesn’t initiate, feel free to say, “I enjoy online dating but know, for me, that meeting in person is an important step. If he tells you to “call him sometime” and leaves his number, Dating With Dignity recommends you go “old school” and let him know that while you’re flattered, you “don’t call men.” Tell him you’re happy to give him your number though. Even though you’re dating 21st century style, you don’t have to do the asking or be the one who pursues. While it can be tempting to have long, intimate phone conversations with someone you really find yourself liking, a phone call before meeting in person is much different than talking on the phone after you’ve started dating someone.
Technology, although enticing, simply cannot replace a real meeting (or a real relationship). It has to be done soon after you meet someone whom you’re actually interested in if it has any chance of becoming something real. Stay in your feminine zone and encourage him to man up! Chatting until the sun comes up seems romantic until you realize that you really have NO IDEA WHO YOU’RE TALKING TO.
You’ve met someone you’re interested in online, but now you’re perhaps a tad frustrated that your budding relationship is seeming more pen pal than love interest — which, of course, begs the question: How do I move a new online relationship offline?